April 3, 2020: Phoebe

Phoebe

I feel your fragile openness is something like a flower,

Shining within life’s brokenness in a stillness that’s full of power . . .

You do like to keep in control, and handle things case by case,

Very careful to keep in your role, but exuding compassion and grace.

I can see you have built up a wall, and look out with strategic mind.

I fear you, but then, when I give you a call, you’re almost always kind.

Somehow, I still don’t comprehend what brings you to where you are.

I feel you’ve been torn and are trying to mend.

If I’m digging too deep, I don’t mean to offend.

I know it’s hard, but you’re willing to be my friend.

We can go play some pool in a bar!

You’re more often than not rather indirect in the things that you ask or express;

Complaints, exhaustion are circumspect ways of saying you’re in distress.

Sometimes, you’re strong and daring, and your freedom seems almost sublime;

An open person who’s open to sharing, but then you’ll say you don’t have the time!

And I want to open you up.  I want to put you at ease,

But while trying to win your trust, you almost always freeze.

Somehow, I still don’t comprehend what brings you to where you are.

I feel you’ve been torn and are trying to mend.

If I’m digging too deep, I don’t mean to offend.

I know it’s hard, but you’re willing to be my friend,

But you’re afraid I might take you too far.

My sense is that you’ve been shattered in the effort to get close to men,

And you want to find what matters, and not be entangled again.

Though you know I would treat you well, and I would work towards understanding,

Still, you don’t want to crawl back into a shell of what might seem too demanding.

So you follow the paths of your duty, and you try to be loving but light.

When you look at life in its beauty, you’re strong and you feel alright.

Somehow, I still don’t comprehend what brings you to where you are.

I feel you’ve been torn and are trying to mend.

If I’m digging too deep, I don’t mean to offend.

I know it’s hard, but you’re willing to be my friend,

Despite the bruises beneath the scars.

Your love is warm and soothing like an evening summer breeze.

You touch me but you keep on moving, but you’re not just trying to tease.

You give what it is you have to give.  You’re not afraid to take a stand.

But the approach-avoidance in how you live makes it hard for me to lend you a hand.

I feel your fragile openness Is something like a flower,

Shining within life’s brokenness which has made a place for your power.

Somehow, I still don’t comprehend what brings you to where you are.

I feel you’ve been torn and are trying to mend.

If I’m digging too deep, I don’t mean to offend.

I know it’s hard, but you’re willing to be my friend,

I see you shine like a star!

April 2, 2020: Integrity: Righteousness and Knowing

Integrity:  Righteousness and Knowing

The basis of my own integrity

Is my commitment to what is true and right.

I admit that in life’s complexity,

It’s never completely in sight.

Large issues are not black and white!

Yet some say that nothing is right or wrong:

That it all depends on a person’s perspective.

Saying, it’s helpful if we’re able to “get along”

While each of us follows our own objective,

Emphasizing what proves “effective”.

Here, the case for community can well be made -

That what serves the one is drawn from the whole,

Through mindful detachment; through honest trade . . .

Yet, these aren’t the constraints by which everyone rolls,

Nor the most direct methods for reaching a goal!

I think of how nature has run its course

Without the necessity for a drawn-out plan!

Yet the interaction of various forces

Creates some balance in its slow-changing spans,

And diversity branching from where life began.

We might say, “It’s all good” from that cosmic view,

But not for a group or an individual

Where life’s limitations ring all too true;

Where we struggle to determine what values will rule,

To say “It’s all good” is both shallow and cruel!

We gain a concept of bad and good

From what makes a pleasing combination.

We imagine things happen the way they should

When they meet a reasonable expectation,

Or when there’s a plausible explanation.

To engage with life, we must be aware:

Must make distinctions, both sharp and broad;

Must recognize how space is shared;

That both nature and cultures must follow their laws,

And there are many elements in every cause.

Then, in setting out to secure success,

We must begin with a dream,

But to fashion it is a process,

And rarely a singular scheme:

Things are never quite what they may seem!

As we live, we acquire understanding

Of what nurtures social and personal health;

The part we would play through our social standing;

Our strengths, our weakness; our pathways to wealth;

The dimensions through which we may find the Self.

For that, a person must aim to be true

To a basic sense of what’s right, and their knowing,

Which determines what they will choose to do

To live with others, and to keep on growing:

Secure in their roots and in where they are going.

Whatever our intent or position,

We have got to acquire the relevant facts

By which we can make an effective decision

About whether and how we need to act,

And it’s oft got to be exact!

And in every group, there are social norms

That define a process, or a standard, to which all agree:

So a dance can take place in it’s proper form,

Or production can work with consistency,

Or music be played in its harmony.

Some things in life are arbitrary:

Someone in charge makes eccentric demands.

Eccentric ideas become customary

We know that it’s not in our hands.

We must choose where to take our stand,

Especially since there are higher principles:

Like, the path of love, and the path of what’s just.

They may be described in poems and symbols,

In one’s Faith, or a quality in which we can trust,

Which we choose when we sense that we must!

  

In our knowings, we must know our main concerns.

There will always be subjective and objective elements.

What’s at stake-and-for-who?  What’s needed to learn?

What foresight have we, and what defense?

What grounding to give us our confidence?

What’s right and wrong will not always be clear,

But we have principles to guide us into being aligned,

So when conflicts arise - and they’re sure to appear,

We can respond with a soundness of heart and mind,

And not just react as we may be inclined!

Life will always test our metal.

What’s our price and our standard for “getting along”?

It doesn’t set well when we always settle,

So we need to take courage; We gotta be strong

When we know that there’s something wrong!

Yes - there is value, and a time for toleration.

It’s not wise to jump to a quick conclusion,

But there’s limits to the gains of investigation:

When it seems we’re involved in unwholesome collusion,

I don’t want to remain in a place of confusion!

There are always going to be consequences

From taking the byways where we’ve chosen to go.

Sometimes, it will make a difference

What we think and what we actually know.

My higher I-deal is where I must flow!

April 1, 2002: Retail Sales

Retail Sales

Two aspects of running a store:

Sometimes it’s hectic, and sometimes it’s a bore.

There are so many items to put on the shelf,

Including your thoughts; your thoughts of yourself.

And then there are the customers that “always come first”.

They are the best, but they are also the worst!

Some problems are easy, but some are complex.

You don’t always know just what to do next.

The limits can vary on your going beyond:

The volume of clients, and the way that you bond.

But if you really don’t know how to meet a request,

You say, “I’ve run out of options.  I’ve done my best.”

Of course, you want to make some kind of sale!

But let it go.  Most often, you fail!

People return if they think that you care;

That you wish them the best, and you try to be fair.

July 4: Joy's Last Days

Joy’s Last Days

Your mouth hung open;
Your hair fallen out.
You can’t make a sound,
But you’re lucid, no doubt.

Taking in your well wishers
Takes your mind off the strain
Your strength is fading.
Not much, but some pain.

I know you have struggled.
You seem somehow at ease,
Resigned in your knowledge
Of the end of disease.

You can hardly swallow
What we drip on your tongue,
And though you must be hungry
You no longer crave.

Yet we still recognize you,
Here, where you belong
We remind you of times
We shared and our songs,

Grateful for the time
You can still be around.
You struggled to breathe
A drug helped you to calm.

You seemed so peaceful,
And then you were gone.

July 5: Joy

Joy

I’m not all into the grief and lamentation
Over what once was and can no longer be.
I’m not exactly in the mode of celebration,
But I sense that her gifts still affect you and me.
So many pictures of our lives she enabled us to see.

She was an astute, energetic, kindly person to know
Through the games she could play and the skills she could teach.
I recall her ingenuity, but now I let it go,
While others keep groping for what’s now beyond our reach.
Only she had the power to hold a wave upon the beach.

I wish I could share my love in a poem or a song.
It’s my own sense of reality that’s getting in my way.
She had a way of distinguishing what do and don’t belong
But when I held my ground for what I needed to say,
She could see where I was coming from, and it would be okay.

Acceptance wasn’t tied to a certain point of view,
But to hold a conversation with good humor and respect.
I’ve been trapped in my attachments to what I think is false or true.
Her knowledge was more subtle, and even indirect.
Her gift - to make observances, and not to introspect.

We sought to share our love in authenticity,
And relish our adventures:  Choose a goal and map a route.
As in art, so in life, we display our liberty.
Life is too, too short to analyze it out,
But in our changing reflections, we find what life’s about.

So we learn through the process of playful interaction;
A gentle curiosity for hearing different views:
The defenses people build and the points of attraction,
Where we put our attention and the colors that we choose . . .
Just a few of her perspectives that we don’t have to lose!

July 6: Art As Resistance To Change

Art As Resistance to Change

Change in life is an awful annoyance.

You just get started and it’s time to end.

You want to remember your state of buoyance.

You want to be with your long-lost friend.

You know you can’t always keep it together

Or remember the flowering of your simple heart.

You want beauty - or pain - to go on forever,

And those are the moments that you turn to art.

Your art then takes a life of its own.

At least, it never meets my own expectation,

But it reflects a part of what was meant to be shown.

The rest is a balance of luck and creation.